by Aimée A. Laramore, MBA, owner/lead consultant of ALlyd Solutions, Inc.

Every effective fundraising training or workshop experience in the development arena illuminates the importance of listening. We routinely emphasize the importance of appreciative inquiry and open-ended questions to become proficient in identifying and illuminating the philanthropic passions of the donor. Over time, the best in the field are accomplished at listening to God, listening to mission and vision, and listening to the donor, too. The question for this season is; “Are YOU listening?” 

Four months into the pandemic, I began to experience a new level of listening. My reordered life rhythms and new Sunday morning worship routine became the backdrop to poignant stories at the intersection of faith, pastoral concern, and stewardship trends. I was reminded of the sacred calling that leads people to be resilient in the face of difficult times and solutions-oriented in the most complex of situations. Unanticipated organizational change is often a slow and arduous process. Yet, as I listened to clients and conversation partners, I was reminded of the innovation possible when our values guide us. I was surrounded by diverse leaders striving to hear the constituents they serve. Their listening translated into increased ministry, solidified outreach and compassionate pastoral care to those experiencing loss. I became a witness to this tangible impact.

In July, I was invited to serve on a panel on race, racism and white supremacy. On the reading list for participants, I noted the article White Supremacy Culture from Dismantling Racism: A Workbook for Social Change Groups, by Kenneth Jones and Tema Okun. 

The article led to one of many ah-ha moments about the potential of listening in this pandemic moment. Throughout the summer I encountered numerous churches that had crafted thought provoking reading lists and learning opportunities, as they embraced the opportunity to reshape their faith culture and community at this moment in history. Development officers, mindful of shifting goals and campaign unknowns, listened intently to the experiences of donors and faith communities, intent on making the best possible choice to move forward. As leaders wrestled with the question of what is God calling us to do, I was again reminded that we can only answer that question with listening.

The article identified several characteristics of white supremacy culture which show up in organizations. The process of deeply reading the article prompted me to listen to my own discomfort and to consider what I was being called to do. Two of these characteristics stood out to me: perfectionism and a sense of urgency. These traits were so indicative of the development culture I have become accustomed to, I was prodded to think more deeply about the necessity to align our values with our practice of raising resources. The discipline of listening is not only for cultivation or “the ask”; the discipline of listening is for the organizational culture that shapes our work.

Culture is learned, subjective and cumulative; it is ever present and often very difficult to name or identify. Organizations led by people of color are not exempt from the many damaging characteristics of white supremacy culture. As the article named the identifiers of white supremacy culture, I could feel the tension and weight of my own work style and organizations I served for my entire career. I noted in myself, a professional strategist of color, countless traits that I had adopted, in pursuit of acceptance, fitting in, and being recognized in a non-diverse field. In perfectionism, making a mistake is confused with being a mistake. I have championed Intentional Progress Over Perfection (IPOP) for the entirety of my career in nonprofit capacity building and fundraising, but realized in my own business framework, I too had adopted perfectionism as an acceptable trait. Although mistakes are inevitable opportunities to learn, and a very real part of personal growth and development, internalizing mistakes can erode who you are as a person. Mistakes are healthy. Perfectionism is a culture trap.

When teaching about a culture of generosity, I unpack the importance of developing an authentic culture of appreciation. A healthy approach to organizational growth incorporates a practice of speaking to what is going well and affirming how the work is done, not just an itemization of what is done. Countless major gifts from donors of color, philanthropic milestones and history-making development achievements can be credited to listening. A sense of urgency can offer an organization or donor a call to action. But that same sense of urgency can mistakenly lead well-meaning individuals to promise too much for too little in return; or sacrifice the interests of people of color for the sake of winning a perceived bigger prize. In reality, the work often takes longer than expected and realistic goals can be both necessary and unpopular. Development professionals of color echo these sentiments in unison, but we often fail to listen. In pursuit of a new, more inclusive operating paradigm, we are called to assess the role of perfectionism and urgency in how we engage others. We measure progress as bigger and more, without attention to the costs of the decisions being made. Asks are often made at the sacrifice of the giver, at the risk of relationship and without the necessary context for meaning. These traps can be avoided by listening.

In listening, we have an opportunity to reshape and reimagine the professional environments and standards that frame how we do the work. Listening requires of each of us a renewed commitment to embrace what is uncomfortable and to sit and rest with truth that may not be our own. There is a reason why fundraising requires the honed skill of listening. Sitting with and understanding the truth of someone else is a gift of its own. The art of listening is also good business for fundraisers, healthy organizations and philanthropists alike. In recognizing that listening is indeed Holy, the benefits provide for an authentic love of humankind that sustains each of us in unprecedented times.

Aimée A. Laramore is the owner/lead consultant of ALlyd Solutions, Inc. With 25 years of experience in organizational capacity building and development, she currently serves as the Philanthropic Strategist for the PhD Program in African-American Preaching and Sacred Rhetoric at Christian Theological Seminary. She enjoys serving as an Adjunct Assistant Teaching Professor at the University of Notre Dame where she teaches Board Relations and Management. A friend of Lake Institute, she served as Associate Director under founding director, William G. Enright, PhD. She is passionate about her work at the intersection of faith, giving and culture; which can be found throughout the country in religious institutions, nonprofit organizations, foundations and intermediaries across the country.